The Big D

I’m going to the Big D, and I don’t mean Dallas.

I remember from when I signed up for this blog, the topics could or could not have to do with quitting. You just had to end it with your day count, which I will do. But this is most certainly not about quitting. I just needed a place to type out some of my thoughts in private, and this should do well.

I was kicked out of my house on May 9. I won’t go into detail as to why I was kicked out, but I’ll just say that it’s been building for seven years. Our marriage has essentially been over for seven years, and it would appear we’ve reached a point of no return.

I haven’t been served papers yet. I doubt very much I’ll begin the proceedings. I’ll just wait.

Mostly I feel like a failure. A failure as both a husband an a father.

For now I’m living down the road with my parents. How pathetic. A 46 year old living with his parents.

We have four kids. Two girls 16 and 13 and two boys 10 and nine. I’m the primary wage earner. We have two assets with any value – our house and my retirement fund. My retirement fund has about four times the value of our house.

I called around, and attorneys cost anywhere between about $200/hour and $230/hour. Some require retainer fees, others do not. Those that do require retainer fees require anywhere between about $2,400 and $3,000.

This is going to cost money I don’t have, not to mention all the stuff I’m going to have to buy when I get a place of my own. Furniture, beds, dressers, television.

So basically, I’ve gotten a bunch of random topics listed out. Maybe I’ll go in to more detail on fewer topics as I go on with this blog.

Before I go – I’m going through the worst phase of my life nicotine free. That at least is something to be proud of.

Quit 1,223 days.